CRAPPYPASTA

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Getting To Mr. Jokester

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hahaha my name is Liam Kilman but most call me mister jokester you see I’m 23 years old and I will be until the day someone figures out how to kill me for good.
I’m not that bad a guy haha you see everytime I’m killed haha I’m made into a spirit and I go and find myself a new host to hold my soul until my body can regrow and then they are my mate I mark them and all hahahe the only way you can figure out I’m not human anymore is my smile that the main reason to why my name is mister jokester …
you want to know how I became this way

It was mid november of 1999 in a small town in maryland at a carnival I was young and fresh out of college looking for a girl cause I thought girls liked carnivals so I’m walking around and then I meet cindy a cute blonde who looked as innocent as can be …
what I didn’t know was cindy was a a pyscho killer who eats her victims bodies … my soul was the only thing left after she ate my body and put my bones in acid I didn’t know how I did it but somehow I went inside her …
being inside her I took some of her pyscho with me which is why I have a joker smile.
A week after my body was ready and I tore my way out of her to my misfortune I had killed her oh what a sad day that was but she left me with a smile on my face so I can’t complain …
after about five years I died from a car crashing into me and I put my spirit in another woman she took longer to process my body in it took a month and it usually takes a week or two for my body to grow back, …
I always die and come back I can’t stop it haha just like the random laughter ….

Hahahahaha but you can’t keep the beast in for long hahahahahahahahahaha … I die like a human but ill kill like a skilled ninja or some motherfuckin shit hahahahahahahaahaahahahahhahahahahahahahhhh thanks for listening to my sad life and maybe if you’re lucky ill come inside you and make you my mate hahahahahahahahaah

Credit To – Deana Eibell

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Getting To Mr. Jokester, 2.3 out of 10 based on 44 ratings
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  • Demonicus

    The tag is very fitting, I am not sure if he is trolling because the first thought I had was that this was going to be a Joker rip off. I later discovered it was a generic possession story. The “ha ha”s are very annoying in the sentences because they have no place there. I got through the first paragraph before I gave up. 1/10 and down vote.

  • J T

    As Dem noted, the “haha”s are distracting and, it should be noted, don’t communicate laughing very well. That is what one writes when texting, not scaring.

    The first paragraph is just an info dump. All that information, if it is important, should be worked into the story.

    The “flashback” brings up the question of why the first paragraph is needed at all. As the Mad Hatter said, “start at the beginning, and when you get to the end, stop.” As it is, you are starting at the end, then jumping back to the beginning.

  • madinverse

    This read more like a double entendre than a Creepypasta. Either way, it was bad. If you were going for the former, then you should have given Cindy a French name (Marguerite?) and mentioned that you met her at the carnival while she was pulling taffy. If you were trying to write the latter, then you should have invented a more compelling character than a ghost on a nitrous oxide trip.

    DC already owns the rights to “Deadman”, so I don’t see anything salvageable here. Maybe if you come up with some other premise and learn how to properly use punctuation, you’ll be successful.

    • InsanityUnderHats

      I actually reread this pasta as a double entendre due to your comment, and suddenly, the story makes more sense. Seriously though, this pasta is rancid enough without the ‘hahaha’ every two words.

  • jewinator

    TL;DR

    Hahaha lol yolo evil jokester hahal lol scary much smart yolo much deep lololol.

    0/10

  • Alfred Frederick Dinglebottom

    hahaha i read this travesty hahaha

    1/10 and a downvote.

    No criticism deserved for an idiotic troll pasta.

  • http://www.atticussattic.wordpress.com Katherine C

    This is an interesting premise, but the execution is so poor that it’s hard to even say that. The idea of an entity that dwells within a host long enough to regenerate, and then destroys (or mates with? That part confused me) the host is one that I think could be very well done. Sounds like an X-Files to me (though that may be the fact that I recently discovered those on Netflix). But, given the way this is written, I’m not even sure that is the concept here. So, first things first: Sentences. Your story should be made up of sentences, not long strings of words without any discernible beginning or end. You should mark these sentences using (point two) punctuation and capitalization. Failure to do so makes your story mostly unreadable, even if it were the most original and fantastic creepypasta to grace the internet. Cut the “hahaha” mess. It does not add anything to your character and only makes it (even more) difficult to read. And then, take this as an outline of a story, and flesh it out into a real story. This is a collection of plot points, not a story. Adding some depth to the Jokester character, or Cindy, or anyone would make this better. Also, create some scenes, fill in what was going on surrounding these events, and give the characters motivations and emotional valence. I applaud you for trying to tell a story, and I encourage you to keep trying, but at least take the time to follow basic grammatical conventions first. From there, be willing to spend the requisite time to take an idea and flesh it out into a story. I think the idea of an innocent soul, corrupted through possessing the killer, which goes about taking hosts whenever the current body is injured so that they may grow a new host is interesting, but definitely needs a much better showing than what is here. Keep practicing, and maybe try to find some friends willing to help edit and critique what you write in the future. Happy writing!

  • BlueFox

    “ill kill like a skilled ninja or some motherfuckin shit.”

    Ooh, this sentence fragment right here practically doubled the pasta’s creepiness level.

  • QG

    The structure of this text is scarier than the actual pasta. I’m expecting a section for authors to explain themselves. Please, for the love of derpbutt, put some thought into your writing!

    This pasta is too bad to receive fair criticism.

    hahaha 1/10 hahaha downvote.

    If my comment ends up just below Katherine’s, I’ll look like a complete asshole.

  • http://talesfromdickcounty.tumblr.com The Operator

    There are crappypastas that are mediocre, but could be fixed with some good constructive critique.

    And then there are abominations like this thing.

  • Clockwork Candle

    All it takes is one bad day to reduce the sanest man alive to lunacy. The author had 47.

  • Rileyk61

    In the lines of Zoidberg, this was bad and you should feel bad. Do you really have to write out “hahahahahahahaha” in about every sentence? And also, psycho killers (as if we never saw that before) are generally kryptonite to a pasta. This was one of the worst ‘original’ pastas that I’ve seen. 1/10 and a downvote for you, mister.

  • CrazyWhovian

    Great story concept. I would love it if you put a little more work into it. I greatly encourage you to write this story again, but add more effort. You might think that an eight year old wrote this because he was bored. But with the same story, and more effort, this could definitely make it to the main site!

  • Deana Eibell

    Its just something I threw together in 10 mins I was just having fun since I was told creepypasta was allowing submissions again and I was like why not, this is a troll yes , if I was really serious his name would not be mister jokester and that’s not how he’d come back to life again


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