CRAPPYPASTA

For those pastas that are smelling less than fresh…


Sleep

| 9 Comments

You are dreaming. There is a man, a woman, and a small child in a room. All of them are screaming. You see a man with a knife and he chops all of their heads off.

When you wake up, you are back in bed. You shake the creepy dream off. You walk over to the door when you notice something in your hand.

It’s a bloody knife.

Credit To: Jon

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Sleep, 3.1 out of 10 based on 17 ratings
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9 Comments

  1. Lazy with no real buildup. I’m not a big fan of the acusitory style of writing, to me that style only works when giving directions.

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  2. Very lazy writing. This story does nothing for me at all. The fact that it starts off telling you you’re dreaming ruins the story for me.

    If you were the one who chopped off their heads with a knife, which people seem to think is pretty easy, wouldn’t you have recognized yourself? Why would you say “when you wake up you’re in your bed”? Where else would I wake up? I can’t see any way to fix this story short of starting all over, using the basic idea and trying to fill it in a little.

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  3. Sounds vaguely familiar to me. It could be better if there was more of a build-up.

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    Rating: 5.0/5 (1 vote cast)
  4. … I guess we don’t move in our sleep, or alse we would cut ourself and/or let the knife go, in our sleep (and cut cut ourself).

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  5. This type of pasta has been overdone, I suggest you find a totally new storyline and start from there.

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  6. @Black Dahlia Smile Trust me, with these kind of person that barely write 5 lines, you don’t stay polite with them.
    They are wasting Derp’s time.

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  7. This should be in the “You Didn’t Try At All” Category.

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  8. >You Didn’t Even Try At All

    Sixty-eight words does not a good story make. I understand that you were trying for the ‘short story’ thing, but only masters can make a story this short scary.

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    • Not necessarily. Back in the old days of the creepypasta site, we had a thread for super short pastas… and some of them were really good. They left the reader filling in the details, but they were great.

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