CRAPPYPASTA

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The Grunk

| 24 Comments


No one knows what he is, and if he might have been a human once. He hunts at night, and seeks out victims that are alone. After he has found a victim, he sneaks up to it from behind. He kills his victims by biting off its head. And remember, once he has laid his eyes on you, there is no chance of survival.

Credit To: Me

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  • shogunfish

    I honestly am lost for words on this one. Did you just draw a random thing and then spend five seconds thinking up a half-assed description or was there some thought that went into this.

    Honestly I hope the author didn’t draw that, the drawing shows at least some ability (shading and such), while the writing is terrible.

  • YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE USERNAME!

    Think of more scary name? And don’t make it look like a kid in daddy’s trousers?

  • IT WAS THE GHOOOOOOST!

    Umm… cool picture but this isn’t deviantArt bud.

  • TVATR

    I laughed once I saw the picture.

  • Poodleinacan

    Great!
    We really needed a monster that kills itself…. By eating it’s own head off…

  • Poodleinacan

    … Is it me, or the monster look like it has frog legs? (the food version of frog legs… Not those that are still on a living frog)

  • Mister X

    “He kills his victims by biting off its head”. So…wouldn’t that mean that the monster will be the one to die? Scaaary…

  • Hi

    Deviantart or fiction press would be far superior places to put this.

  • The Operator

    The Grunk – the unholy son of Deadpool and Pantskat.

  • Binks

    I guess when it bites its own head off, acid spews out or something, or maybe it hopes that the victim will trip and it’ll fall over and suffocate them

  • JojoBal0ney0

    The Grunk. Known for committing suicide behind his victims. What terrors people most is that they have to get the monster blood off of their cloths. But, what is most intriguing about this fascinating creature?

    How do you eat your own head off?

    MIND=BLOWN

  • JoeyJoJo

    I have never seen a story with less effort put into it, and I have read quite a few stories on this site.

  • DerpyHooves

    Is this the shortest pasta on the site? Seriously, make a better pasta.

  • pinkamina

    He’s adorable!

  • PETA

    There’s nothing scary or amusing about a suicidal frog caught in a condom. I and my animal adoring associates are outraged and demand the release of this troubled and sexually frustrated amphibian at once!

    • A Zergling (Wearing a Combine Civil Protection Uniform)

      I hate all you PETA guys… I hate you so fucking bad…
      Tofu boy was an awful game! the guys who made Super Meat Boy even turne your own trick against you and thus; the Tofu Boy easter egg;
      type in the code “PETAphile”, and you unlock tofu boy. it can barely jump worth shit, and is slow as fuck. it can’t beat the first level.
      now would you kindly get fed to the zerglings?

      (I swear to god, I remember some sort of PETA picture.)
      (StarCraft: heart “for” the swarm)
      (now, I want to literally break into their headquarters and kill them all with a chemical flamethrower. I. HATE. PETA.)

  • Ms.Not-So-Human

    The description makes it sound like one of those lizard/human hybrids from Mockingjay. Just thought I’d point that out.

  • bravo104

    This really deserves you didn’t even try at all. It doesn’t even have a story.

  • Alfred Frederick Dinglebottom

    Oh great, I need to change my underwear.

    I pissed myself from laughing at that picture. It’s hilarious. It looks like a slightly angry deformed gorilla.

  • sweegywoods

    Why do its limbs vaguely resemble penises?

  • http://chairhiro.tumblr.com/tagged/crappypasta%20bingo The Operator

    Next to ‘THE DARK ONE’, one of the best examples of Ahh! Lame Monsters!

  • Jaff

    “And remember, once he has laid his eyes on you, there is no chance of survival.”
    This made me think, “All your base are belong to us. You have no chance to survive, make your time.”

    Terrible idea for a monster, terrible drawing. If you’re going to make a monster, try to make it creepy. Some thing that you don’t see, but if it sees you, you ARE going to die just is not scary. It’s not like I’ll see it coming since it’s super sneaky, and it’s not like I know where it is and when it’ll get me. So there’s nothing to fear. That’d be like being afraid of a jet engine ’cause it may fall from the sky and crush me and some random point in my life. It just doesn’t make sense.

    • A Zerg Hydralisk (Wearing a Traffic Cone on Head)

      “dude where are you?”
      “in your base, killing your d00ds”
      “kekekekeke”

  • A Zerg Hydralisk (Wearing a Traffic Cone on Head)

    who else laughed their ass off at the picture and the comments?
    combining the comments together, we have a;
    suicidal frog caught in a condom kid wearing his dad’s trousers whos limbs vaguely resemble penises thats a hybrid from mockingjay and legs look like food.
    it attacks by commiting suicide behind its victims by self-decapitation using its jaws (somehow) and spews acid once decapitated.

    i love you all.