Most people think that rudolph the red nosed reinderr is a jolly christmas figure that helped santa claus pull his magical Mostly but no your wrong.
You see many years ago there was a russian hunter named rudolph von rindear who was addicted to cocain. Rudolph snorted coke all the time and became mentally insane. After killing numorous people and illudeing the police for months time finally caught up to ol rudolph and he was arrested and sentanced to life in a mental institution. There after years of being made fun of for his akward name and unbearable cocain addiction he began to think he was a reindeer with a red nose. The reason he wasnt allowd to join in other “reindeer” games is because the instiution feared he wuld kill again. The reason behind the red nose was due to all the cocain he had snorted causeing his nose to swell and bleed. So the next time you think or that jolly reindeer that saved the day think of what monster your really worshipping.
Credit To – chris wiz
the truth behind rudolph the red nosed reindeer,
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January 2, 2013 at 3:49 am
oh. my. god. i really hope this was a joke… i don’t like to post mean comments because i know how it makes people feel, but this was terrible.
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January 2, 2013 at 3:54 am
First off, no one worships Rudolph. Second, Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer was invented by a man named Robert L. May in 1939 as advertising for Montgomery Ward. If the story was better, I might have let it slide, but NOOOOO, we got this piece of garbage.
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May 17, 2013 at 4:02 pm
“Nobody worships Rudolph”? Pffft, says YOU. He died for our sins, and led our Father Santa to our doorsteps to deliver his love and presents! To the Elves we pray, amen.
Okay, now I KNOW I’m going to hell.
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January 2, 2013 at 6:44 am
You know what? We should remove all our current anti-drug curriculum and replace it with this story.
“If you do coke, kiddos, you can’t play any reindeer games”.
Boom, scared straight.
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January 2, 2013 at 7:58 am
Why doesn’t anyone ever pull my magical Mostly?
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May 23, 2013 at 9:15 am
Love it!
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January 2, 2013 at 12:42 pm
I see you’re puttting the new “Stop” category to good use.
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January 2, 2013 at 5:28 pm
Amen.
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January 2, 2013 at 8:41 pm
for the record Rudolph Von Rindear sounds a lot more like a German name than a Russian name.
The second problem is the rest of your story. I can think of so many better explanations than just having him be a coked up-murderer.
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January 5, 2013 at 7:00 am
this doesn’t even deserve a vote,no matter how low the vote is.
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January 5, 2013 at 11:37 pm
He snorter “coke” all the time? Why would he snort a pop up his nose?
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January 5, 2013 at 11:38 pm
snorted*
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January 6, 2013 at 12:42 am
Right off the bat I will say, if I could give this a negative vote… I would. This being on Crappypasta, I naturally expect to see some failed and rather smelly pastas. But this goes beyond Crappypasta, this is a travesty. Part of me wants to believe that this was written intentionally to get onto the Crappypasta website, because the onlt other option means someone sharing my planet is really this stupid.
My (numerous) issues with this pasta are as follows, in order from most obvious, to just needs tweaking:
1. Spelling and Grammar; My youngest Nephew can spell 12 letter words better than you can spell five letter words, and the grammar is simply awful… to the point it made me physically ill.
2. Believability; Part of what makes all Creepypastas “Creepy” is the ominous sense of it feeling entirely possible. In no way whatsoever did any of this story feel possible.
- Why is he specifically a hunter?
- Rindear is not even a name, and certainly not Russian.
- How would a coke-head wind up being affiliated with a fabled Christmas Legend like Santa and his Reindeer, much less on a global scale?
3. Laziness; There are almost no signs of effort put into this pasta. By the time I am finished with my review, I will have put more effort into it than you put into this pasta, and my review will be longer too. Which leads me to…
4. Length and Detail; They go hand in hand. People wanna know what, who, when, where, and how… (leaving out the “why” is commonplace for creepypasta, since they are meant to be unexplained). Many of the pastas on the main site are at least a few paragraphs long. You explained very little.
- What did Rudolph look like?
- What lead to Rudolph’s addiction?
- Was Rudolph married, did he have children?
- How many people did he kill?
- How, when, and where was he finally caught?
I could list missing details for a very long time, but I am afraid I simply don’t have the patience. Due to lack of a smaller number, 1 out of 10.
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May 23, 2013 at 9:18 am
I don’t think the author realises that reindeer are real animals. I think he may well be just a tad, no wait…completely stupid.
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January 6, 2013 at 5:07 pm
Why god, why? In the future, I am just going to show this story to my children and ruin there Christmas memories for life.
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January 7, 2013 at 2:19 am
Great! Another reason to be afraid at Christmahanakwanzika time.
But on a serious note, when I read the first sentence in the 2nd paragraph, I just sat in front of the computer astonished for about a good 3 minutes.
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January 11, 2013 at 5:49 pm
Well…
That didn’t escalate at all. That rode the elevator straight to Writer’s Hell.
I’m sorry, but no. Thank you for not a thing.
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February 2, 2013 at 4:06 am
No, please, I am laughing so hard I will faint in front of my computer. xD
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February 15, 2013 at 11:52 pm
Commas! what do you have against them?!?!?
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March 29, 2013 at 1:53 am
One day, I was reading a creepy pasta, “A “loving” husband,” if I am able to recall it correctly, when I stumble across a post written by a strange little man named “Creepy Critic” I read his comment and nodded along as he gave helpful advice, but then he brought up the topic of the worst, crappiest crappypasta he had read.
“All in all, this was no where near being the worst Crappypasta I have seen (for those interested in what I dub the worst, simply type “Rudolph” in the search bar and click the only pasta that shows up).”
I think to myself, why not? and follow his directions blindly. And it led me here. And I now fully comprehend the meaning behind him labeling this one so poorly. Please don’t make anymore stories.
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